Rimming is licking, kissing or tonguing around a partner's anus, the puckered ring of skin at the opening of the ass. It's also called a rim job, eating ass or, formally, anilingus, and it's a type of oral sex, not anal sex. Anyone of any gender can give one or get one. Done well, it's one of the most intimate, deliciously filthy things two people can share.
It also comes with real questions. Is it clean? What does it taste like? Can you catch something? This is a frank sex-ed guide for adults, so you'll get straight answers.
Inside: technique, six positions, honest infection facts from the CDC and the NHS, barriers, toys and a long FAQ.
What’s in this guide
- What is rimming?
- Why rimming can feel so good
- What rimming feels like for the receiver
- The ick factor: poop, smell and taste
- How to bring up rimming with a partner
- How to get ready
- How to give a rim job: step by step
- The best rimming positions
- Tips for the giver
- Is rimming safe? Infection risks in plain words
- The best rimming toys and gear
- Aftercare and cleanup
- Rimming FAQ
- Ready to try it?
What is rimming?
Rimming means using your mouth on the outside of someone's anus: kissing it, licking it, circling it and sometimes pressing the tip of your tongue just inside. The "rim" is the ring of skin around the opening. The CDC lists anilingus as one of the types of oral sex, alongside fellatio (on a penis) and cunnilingus (on a vagina).
What "rim job" means, and other names
To rim someone is to lick their ass. A rim job is the act itself. You'll also hear:
- Eating ass: the bluntest slang.
- Tossing salad: older slang for the same thing.
- Anilingus (or analingus): the formal word, and the one the CDC uses.
- Anal play: the bigger category. NSW Health in Australia counts rimming as anal play: a tongue around or inside the anus.
Who does it
Anyone. Men with men, women with women, men with women, trans and nonbinary partners. Every body has an anus, and who gives or receives has nothing to do with gender or orientation.
Does rimming mean anal sex?
No. Rimming is a mouth on an ass. Anal sex is penetration by a cock, strap-on or toy. A yes to one is not a yes to the other. Some couples use rimming as a warm-up for anal or pegging; plenty treat it as the main event.
Why rimming can feel so good
Short version: nerves. A 2009 NHS sexual-health leaflet says "The anus is highly sensitive and rich in nerve endings." The medical reference StatPearls adds that the outer part of the anal canal is wired with the same kind of nerves as skin, so it senses touch, temperature and pain. A warm, wet tongue triggers touch and temperature.
- The sphincters. Two rings of muscle sit just inside the rim. You can squeeze and relax the outer one on purpose, and relaxing it usually feels better than clenching.
- The perineum. The skin between the genitals and the anus is sensitive too, and it's the bridge from front to back.
- Shared wiring. A 2025 paper in the journal Sexual Medicine notes that the pudendal nerve, the main nerve of the genitals, also supplies the external anal sphincter and the skin around the anus. Some people feel rimming in their cock or clit too.
The flip side: the Merck Manual notes that the anal canal and the skin next to it are highly sensitive to pain. Gentle beats rough.
Then there's the head game. Being adored in a place you were taught to hide is a turn-on all by itself.
What rimming feels like for the receiver
People describe it as warm, wet, soft and shivery: ticklish at first, then melting. For some, the sensation is the point. For others, it's the thrill of being that exposed and that wanted.
How to relax into it:
- Breathe out slowly. Holding your breath makes you clench.
- Let your belly and butt go soft. You can't force relaxation, but you can allow it.
- Pick a position you can sink into. Face-down with a pillow under your hips is the easiest start.
Give feedback: "slower," "softer," "right there," "don't stop." Push back into their mouth or guide their head with your hand.
Not your thing? That's fine. Nobody owes anyone a rim job.
The ick factor: poop, smell and taste
Plainly: the anus is where poop comes out. That's why first-timers hesitate. Here's the calm version.
- Poop. After a bathroom trip and a shower, the outside is usually just skin. If you do see a trace, stop, wipe, wash, laugh, and decide together whether to keep going.
- Smell. A freshly washed ass smells like skin, maybe a little musky.
- Taste. Mostly like skin: a bit salty, a bit musky, sometimes nothing much. Scented soap tastes like soap, so go mild.
- Clean isn't germ-free. Malta's government sexual-health site puts it bluntly: "Even a recently washed anus can carry infectious microorganisms." That's why the safety section matters.
Rinsing inside beforehand (douching) is something some people do. It's optional, most people find a bathroom trip plus a shower is plenty, and this guide doesn't cover how to do it.
Anyone can stop at any time, for any reason, including "I'm stuck in my head about it." No explanation needed.
How to bring up rimming with a partner
Pick a relaxed moment outside the bedroom, keep it light, and make it easy to say yes, no or maybe. Try:
- "I've been thinking about your ass a lot. Would you ever let me kiss you there?"
- "Have you ever been rimmed? I'm curious about trying it, giving or getting."
Not sure how to start? Fill out our Yes, No, Maybe list together, or each take the Kink Test, which shows a couple only the yeses you share.
Before anything happens, agree on a stop word (red works) and a non-verbal signal, like two taps on a thigh, for when someone's mouth is busy. Then look for an enthusiastic yes, not a shrug.
If your partner asked you
You don't owe a yes. You can say "maybe, if": if we both shower first, if we use a dental dam, if it's just kisses the first time. You can ask to receive first, or say no and offer something else. All fair answers.
How to get ready
- Bathroom first. Go a while beforehand, not five minutes before.
- Shower. The CDC advises washing your hands, genitals and anus with soap and water before and after sex. Showering together doubles as foreplay.
- Rinsing is optional.
- Nails. Trim and file them smooth if fingers are joining in.
- Hair is your call. Trimming makes washing easier; shaving right before can leave the receiver itchy. Rimming works either way.
- Check your mouth. Malta's government sexual-health site says to skip rimming if you have gum disease, mouth ulcers or cuts, or have just brushed or flossed. Skip it with bleeding gums or a cold sore too: the NHS warns that herpes can pass through oral sex with someone who has a cold sore.
- Set the stage. A towel, barriers and lube within reach, water for the giver, and a pillow or wedge.
How to give a rim job: step by step
Think slow build, not sprint.
- Start everywhere else. Kiss and lick the backs of their thighs, their cheeks and the small of their back. Make them wait for it.
- Check in. "Still want this?" Remind each other of the stop word.
- Spread gently. Rest your palms on their cheeks and part them slowly. Let them feel your breath first. If you're using a dental dam, put it in place now.
- Lick the perineum. Slow, wide licks from behind the balls or the bottom of the vulva toward the rim. If your partner has a vulva, your tongue travels front to back only.
- Kiss the rim. Soft, closed-mouth kisses first, then open-mouthed ones.
- Go flat and wide. Relax your tongue and lick slowly across the whole area, like the last of an ice cream cone. Keep everything wet.
- Circle. Trace slow circles around the rim with the tip of your tongue, wide at first, then tighter. Ask: "Like that? Faster?"
- Build to the peak. When they push back into your mouth, try quick flicks, a steady rhythm, or a gentle press at the center if they want it. Reach around for their cock or clit. When something works, keep doing exactly that.
- Wind down. Slow back to flat licks and kisses, then out to their cheeks and thighs.
- Check in again. Ask what they loved, then head to aftercare.
Tongue techniques
| Technique | How it feels | When to use it |
|---|---|---|
| Flat, wide lick | Warm, soft, all over | Warm-up and wind-down |
| Slow circles | Teasing, focused on the rim | Building |
| Tip flicks | Light, quick, electric | Building toward the peak |
| Pointed press at the center | Fuller, more intense | The peak, only if they want it |
| Kisses and gentle suction | Like making out with it | Transitions |
| Flat tongue held still | They set the pressure by moving | When your tongue needs a rest |
| Spelling the alphabet | Unpredictable, playful | Variety mid-session |
The flat licks and circles from our guide to eating pussy carry straight over.
Using your hands and adding genital play
- Spread and hold. Your hands keep the cheeks open so your face isn't doing all the work.
- Reach around. Stroke their cock, rub their clit or hold a vibrator against them while your tongue keeps going.
- Back hand, front hand. One hand for the ass, one for the front, and no swapping without washing.
- Front first, back last. If you're going down on their pussy or cock too, do it before you rim, not after.
- Add a finger or a plug. Once they're relaxed and asking for more, a fingertip at the rim or a slim, flared-base plug such as the Vedo Twist takes things further. Use plenty of water-based lube, like Jo Anal H2O, go slow, never force it, and stop at any sharp pain.
Teeth
Only light, and only if they ask. A gentle nibble on a cheek can be hot. Never bite the rim itself.
The best rimming positions
The best position lets the receiver relax and the giver breathe.
1. On all fours, with a pillow
The receiver kneels on hands and knees, or drops their chest onto a pillow with their butt up. The giver kneels behind. Easy to add hands, and the receiver can push back for more.
2. On the back, hips on a wedge
The receiver lies back and pulls their knees toward their chest. A wedge under the hips, like the large, firm XL Love Cushion, lifts everything into reach, so the giver can lie on their stomach without craning. Bonus: eye contact.
3. Side-lying
The receiver lies on their side and pulls their top knee up toward their chest. The giver lies behind, head resting on the bed. Low effort for both, so it's the one for long, lazy sessions.
4. Bent over the bed edge
The receiver stands at the side of the bed and bends forward at the hips, chest on the mattress. The giver kneels on a pillow on the floor, neck neutral.
5. Sitting on the giver's face
The giver lies on their back and the receiver kneels astride their face, taking their weight on their knees and hovering, so the giver has room to breathe. Agree on a tap-out first: two taps on a thigh means "up, now."
6. Face-down, hips raised
The receiver lies on their stomach with a pillow under their hips, legs apart, and the giver lies between them. The most relaxing position for a nervous receiver.
| Position | Who controls | Giver's neck and jaw effort | Best for |
|---|---|---|---|
| On all fours | Shared | Medium | Adding hands, pushing back |
| On the back with a wedge | Giver | Low | Eye contact, reaching the front |
| Side-lying | Shared | Low | Long, lazy sessions |
| Bent over the bed edge | Giver | Low | Quick, standing play |
| Sitting on the giver's face | Receiver | Low neck, harder jaw | Receivers who like control |
| Face-down, hips raised | Giver | Medium to high | Nervous receivers |
What about a rimming chair? It's a seat with an opening (also called a queening chair). We don't sell one, and the bed edge or a wedge does the same job. For other position aids, browse our sex furniture.
Tips for the giver
- Pace your tongue. A pointed tongue tires fast; a flat, relaxed one is resting. Alternate.
- Move your head, not just your tongue. Let your neck draw the circles.
- Swap in your hands. Lubed fingertip circles buy your jaw a break without breaking the mood.
- Stay wet. Saliva dries on skin. Sip water between rounds.
- Mind your stubble. Short stubble scratches. If you're not clean-shaven, lead with your mouth, not your chin.
- Breathe. Use your nose, turn your head for air, and put a pillow under your chest.
Is rimming safe? Infection risks in plain words
Rimming carries real infection risk, partly because it puts a mouth where germs from poop live. This is general information, not medical advice.
The CDC says oral sex on the anus can spread hepatitis A and B, gut parasites like Giardia, and bacteria like E. coli and Shigella. Risk runs both ways: the CDC's 2021 STI guidelines for clinicians say rectal inflammation (proctitis), whose most common STI causes are gonorrhea, chlamydia, herpes and syphilis, occurs mainly in people with receptive anal exposure, oral-anal contact included. The CDC also notes that few studies look at the risks of getting STIs, other than HIV, from giving oral sex on the vagina or anus. So there's no exact number, just clear ways to lower the risk.
The infections
| Infection | How it can pass | What lowers the risk |
|---|---|---|
| Hepatitis A | A virus in poop. The CDC and NHS both say rimming can pass it | A vaccine (ask a clinician), a barrier, washing |
| Hepatitis B | The CDC says oral sex on the anus can pass it | A vaccine (ask a clinician), a barrier |
| Shigella | A tiny amount of infected poop getting into the mouth (NHS). It can stay in poop for up to 2 weeks after diarrhea stops (CDC) | A barrier, washing before and after, no sex during diarrhea and for at least 2 weeks after |
| Giardia and other gut parasites | Poop germs reaching the mouth (CDC) | A barrier, washing, avoiding contact with poop |
| E. coli, Salmonella, Campylobacter | Poop germs reaching the mouth (CDC) | A barrier, washing, avoiding contact with poop |
| Herpes | Oral sex in general (CDC). The NHS warns it can pass from a cold sore | Skipping it with any sore, a barrier |
| HPV | Oral sex in general (CDC) | The HPV vaccine (ask a clinician), a barrier |
| Gonorrhea, chlamydia, syphilis | Oral sex in general (CDC). The receiver can get rectal infections too | A barrier; ask a clinician about testing |
| HIV | Oral sex in general (CDC) | A barrier; ask a clinician about testing and prevention |
Barriers that lower the risk
The CDC's advice for oral sex on the anus is short: "Use a dental dam." No dam? It also says to cut open a condom to make a square. The NHS recommends a barrier for rimming too, and Malta's government sexual-health site says dental dams, tongue condoms, cut condoms and lube "will greatly reduce the likelihood" of passing STIs and other infections. Lower, not zero.
| Barrier | How to use it | Notes |
|---|---|---|
| Dental dam | Hold the thin square flat over the anus and lick through it | The CDC's go-to for oral sex on the anus |
| Latex sheet | Same as a dental dam | Named on the CDC's Shigella page |
| Condom cut open | Snip off the tip and the rolled ring, cut down one side, open it into a square | Use a non-lubricated condom, per the CDC's Shigella page |
| Glove cut open | Cut off the four fingers, slit it down one side, open it flat | Use an unpowdered latex or nitrile glove |
| Tongue condom | Slip it over your tongue | Listed alongside dams by Malta's government sexual-health site |
Water-based lube is safe with latex barriers. Oil breaks latex down, so keep oils away from dams, condoms and gloves.
How to use a dental dam
- Decide which side faces the body. That side stays toward the body the whole time.
- If you like, dab some water-based lube onto the body side.
- Hold it flat over the anus with both hands, or let the receiver hold it.
- Lick through it. Licks, circles and kisses all still work.
- Use a fresh one if it slips, tears or flips, or if you move to another area, like from the ass to a vulva.
- Throw it away afterward. One dam, one use.
When to skip it
- Diarrhea or a stomach bug. The CDC says to avoid sex if you or your partner has bloody or prolonged diarrhea (more than 3 days), and, to lower the chance of spreading Shigella, to wait at least 2 weeks after diarrhea ends.
- Sores on the mouth, the ass or the genitals, including a cold sore.
- Bleeding from the anus. Talk to your doctor about it.
- Mouth trouble: gum disease, bleeding gums, ulcers or cuts, or you just brushed or flossed.
Never go from back to front
Whatever has touched the ass (mouth, fingers, toys) doesn't go to a vagina or a mouth without a fresh barrier first, or, for fingers and toys, a wash. Malta's government sexual-health site warns that moving from the anus to the vagina can transfer bacteria and cause infection, and NSW Health says to change condoms and wash your hands when switching from anal to vaginal or oral play. The CDC adds: wash your hands after touching the anus or anything that has touched it.
Testing, vaccines and symptoms
- Testing: ask a clinician which tests make sense for you, and tell them you rim or get rimmed.
- Vaccines: ask a clinician about vaccines for hepatitis A and B and for HPV. The CDC calls vaccination "the most effective means of preventing transmission" of hepatitis A and B, and recommends the HPV vaccine for everyone through age 26; adults 27 to 45 can talk it over with their doctor.
- Symptoms: see a clinician if you get diarrhea, stomach cramps, fever, sores, or pain, bleeding or discharge from your ass or genitals after rimming, and mention it.
A barrier lowers the risk. It doesn't remove it. Use it with washing and good timing.
Not sure what you're into yet?
Our Kink Test has a card for rimming. Swipe yes, maybe or no, get your kink archetype, then invite a partner to see only what you both want. Free, private, no sign-up.
The best rimming toys and gear
A tongue is hard to beat, but toys bring rotation that never tires, vibration and hands-free play when you're on your own.
- Rimming plugs have rotating beads at the base that turn at the entrance while the tip vibrates inside, like the B-Vibe Petite Rimming Plug. Browse the rimming collection.
- Tongue toys flick or lick. Use them on the outside only, and only ones whose descriptions name the anus or "anywhere sensitive," like the VibePad 2. See our tongue vibrators.
- Vibrating plugs layer on once rimming has your partner relaxed. Shop vibrating butt plugs.
- A wedge, water-based lube and toy cleaner cover the rest.
| Pick | Best for | Price |
|---|---|---|
| B-Vibe Petite Rimming Plug | A rimming sensation, solo or partnered | $159.95 |
| VibePad 2 | Hands-free licking and grinding | $139.95 |
| Playboy Petal | A flicking tongue on the outside | $73.95 |
| Vedo Twist Rechargeable Anal Plug | The next step after rimming | $36.95 |
| Bedroom Bliss XL Love Cushion | Lifting the receiver's hips | $243.95 |
| Jo Anal H2O Lubricant | Fingers and toys | from $12.95 |
| JO Refresh Foaming Toy Cleaner | Cleanup | $15.95 |
1. B-Vibe Petite Rimming Plug: a rimming sensation, hands-free
Beads in its base rotate to give you a rimming sensation at the opening while the tip vibrates inside, and each job has its own motor. It's 4.9 inches long, 3.9 of them insertable, and 1.4 inches across, so it's compact.
The one-touch wireless remote works from up to 30 feet, so a partner can run it while they kiss their way down your back. Seamless silicone, USB rechargeable. $159.95. Want the larger version? The B-Vibe Rimming Plug ($148.95) offers seven bead patterns over six speeds in all, comes with a wireless remote, and is waterproof.
Get the B-Vibe Petite Rimming Plug here.
2. VibePad 2: hands-free licking you sit on
Set this grinding pad on a chair or another flat surface, sit, and grind. The large wave carries a Vibro Tongue with 7 licking modes, each wave has 7 vibration modes, and the smaller wave heats to as much as 131°F (55°C). It works on the vulva, clitoris and anus, and on the perineum, testicles and anus for people with a penis.
Every function runs separately, with or without the remote (about 32.8 feet of range). Waterproof, auto-off after 30 minutes of inactivity, about 11.4 by 8.1 inches. If you have a vulva, you'll rock back to front across it, so it suits front play best. $139.95.
3. Playboy Petal: a flicking tongue for the outside
The rose-shaped head hides a flicking tongue made for the clit or any sensitive spot, the rim included. The tongue runs through 9 speeds and rhythms, and the stem vibrates with its own 9. Waterproof, USB rechargeable, 6.5 inches tall.
Use the tongue on the outside only, and keep the stem out of anyone's ass: only toys with a flared base belong there. Wash it before it touches a vulva. $73.95.
4. Vedo Twist: the easy next step
The gentle follow-up once rimming has your partner relaxed and asking for more. A slim shaft and rounded tip make it easy to take, the swirling bead texture adds sensation going in and coming out, the shaft is flexible, and it has a flared, T-shaped base. Ten vibration modes, a recessed button you won't bump while you rock, fully submersible, USB rechargeable, silicone. $36.95.
Want a plug a partner can run from their phone? The We-Vibe Ditto+ ($139.95) is app-controlled, with 10-plus vibration modes, a flexible base and two hours of play per charge. More picks live in our guide to the best butt plugs.
5. Bedroom Bliss XL Love Cushion: the giver's best friend
Slide this large, firm foam wedge under the receiver's hips and their pelvis tilts up, so the giver can lie flat and reach without craning. It measures 29.5 by 19 by 10 inches, and the dense foam keeps its height instead of sinking. The outer cover is soft velvet with a water-resistant layer underneath to keep the foam dry, and both layers come off and can go in the washing machine. $243.95.
6. Jo Anal H2O Lubricant: for fingers and toys
A thicker, water-based take on classic JO H2O, with no oil, wax or silicone, so it's safe with all sex toys, silicone included, and with latex condoms. No numbing agents, which is exactly right: you want to feel your body's signals. Odor-free, non-staining, and it rinses off with water. From $12.95.
7. JO Refresh Foaming Toy Cleaner: the cleanup crew
Cover the toy in foam, give it a minute, then rinse it off with water. It works on silicone, latex, rubber and most other materials toys are made from, and nothing is left behind. Good to know: it cleans, it doesn't sterilize. 7 oz, $15.95.
Browse butt plugs and the full range of anal toys. If your partner has a prostate, rimming makes a lovely opening act for prostate massagers.
Aftercare and cleanup
- Bin the barrier. Dams, cut condoms and gloves go straight in the trash.
- Wash up. Hands, genitals and anus with soap and water, as the CDC advises after sex, plus your face.
- Rinse your mouth with water.
- Clean the toys. Follow any care notes that come with each toy. JO Refresh foams on, sits for 60 seconds and rinses off. Let everything dry before you put it away.
- Check in. Some people feel a little exposed afterward. Cuddle, drink some water and ask: "What did you love? Anything to change?"
Rimming FAQ
What is a rim job?
A rim job is licking, kissing or tonguing someone's anus, the ring of skin at the opening of the ass. It's also called rimming, eating ass or anilingus, and the CDC counts it as a type of oral sex. It isn't anal sex. Anyone of any gender can give or receive one.
What does it mean to rim someone in slang?
To rim someone means to lick their ass, usually around the rim of the anus. "Eating ass" and the older "tossing salad" mean the same thing, and "anilingus" is the formal term. If someone says they want to rim you, they're offering their mouth, not asking for anal sex.
What is anilingus?
Anilingus is the formal word for rimming: using the lips and tongue on the anus. The CDC lists it as one of the types of oral sex, alongside fellatio and cunnilingus. It's also spelled analingus, and it's the answer if you've wondered what licking the anus is called.
Is rimming safe?
It carries real infection risk, but you can lower it. The CDC says oral sex on the anus can spread hepatitis A and B, Giardia, E. coli and Shigella. Use a dental dam, wash before and after, skip it with diarrhea, sores or mouth cuts, and ask a clinician about testing and vaccines.
Can you get HIV from rimming?
It's possible. The CDC lists HIV among the STIs that oral sex can spread, and rimming is a type of oral sex. We found no reliable HIV risk figure for rimming alone, so we won't guess one. A dental dam lowers the risk, and a clinician can talk you through HIV testing and prevention options.
What does rimming feel like?
People often describe it as warm, wet, soft and shivery: ticklish at first, then deeply relaxing. The anus is highly sensitive and rich in nerve endings, so a slow tongue can feel intense. Some people feel it in their genitals too. Others find it just pleasant. Both are normal.
What does rimming taste like?
After a shower, mostly like skin: a little salty, a little musky, sometimes of nothing much. Scented soap tastes like soap, so use a mild one. If you notice a bad taste or any trace of poop, stop, wash up and decide together whether to keep going.
Do you need a dental dam for rimming?
It isn't required, but it's what the CDC recommends for oral sex on the anus, and it lowers the risk of passing infections. No dam? The CDC says a condom cut open into a square works too, and its Shigella page specifies a non-lubricated one. Keep the same side toward the body.
Does rimming mean anal sex?
No. Rimming is oral sex on the anus; anal sex is penetration by a cock, strap-on or toy. Agreeing to one is not agreeing to the other. Some people love rimming as a warm-up for anal sex, and plenty enjoy it on its own. Ask about each separately.
What is a rimming chair?
A rimming chair, also called a queening chair, is a seat with an opening in it: the receiver sits, and the giver lies underneath with their face at the opening. We don't sell one, and you don't need one. The edge of the bed or a firm wedge under the hips gives the same access.
What is a rimming toy?
A rimming toy creates a rimming sensation without a partner's mouth. The main type is a rimming plug, with rotating beads at the base that turn at the entrance while the tip vibrates, like the B-Vibe Petite Rimming Plug. Some licking toys, like the VibePad 2, work on the outside of the anus too.
How do you prepare to get rimmed?
Use the bathroom a while beforehand, then shower and wash your anus and the skin around it with mild soap and warm water. Rinsing inside first is up to you; for most people, the bathroom and the shower are plenty. Put a towel down and keep a dental dam and lube within reach.
Ready to try it?
Rimming rewards what every good sex act rewards: a real yes, a slow build and someone paying close attention. Get clean, get comfortable, keep a dam close, start wide and slow, and let your partner's breathing tell you what's working.
When you want more, start with our rimming collection, find out what else your ass can do in our guide to anal orgasms, or take things further with pegging.
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Maya Sterling, AdultLuxe editorial. Read our editorial standards.